The weather is getting extremely hot. I just sit for a minute and I feel a stream of sweat running down my back. I don't want to use AC 24/7 but somehow maybe we need to consider since having a baby around with this kind of weather is not pleasant. He cries and wails inconsolably. Poor thing.

Summer in Dubai has kicked off as well. We are coming back in the full swing of scorching heat. I miss my old life somehow. There were times before I sleep when flashes of yesterday comes knocking in. "What if", can get a little bit dramatic. It can be a little dangerous as well to get to that part. Life has a lot of twists and turns. I am beyond grateful for having my husband and my child. If I chose career I am not sure if I could be just as happy as I am now.

I miss work. A part from being a mom it's just as important to have your own identity outside the home. I love being a parent. I never knew I could love this much. Seeing him smile at me just melts my heart like butter. I love being a wife. I love being in a serious and committed relationship. I'm a hopeless romantic who loves anything corny and mushy . My husband got me with his cheesy heartfelt old-school love letters and tugging along to everywhere I go like a helpless puppy. But being good at something you do before all these other stuff came in the mix is also extremely significant to ones's identity as an individual.

I have this immense desire to excel in what I do. I guess I am guilty from putting too much pressure on myself, whether it's being a mother and a wife and also as an employee or whatever it is that I decide to do.

I am waiting for something.