Beach days

 As we officially bid Adieu to winter, my husband and I together with the little man decided to spend our lazy rest days in the beach.

    The first day we just came mid afternoon to catch some waves. Sasha and I played in the sand burying our feet with glee. While the husband was sitting somewhere studying for his recurrent. Indeed it was better staying out in the sun rather than sitting all day in the house.  I'm  always in the mood to go out and explore or just sit outside and stare at sunsets. We brought some snacks with us. We ran in the grass, playing hide and seek while I catch glimpse of my Russian studies. Sort of, yeah I am really getting it.


     One day we decided to take a dip. The sun was out shining and the kids were having fun. And so we brought our swimwears and took the plunge only then we realize damn! it's still winter-cold water. The beach waves made us thought it won't get into our skin but only when we went home and saw Sasha coughing that we realized it wasnt still a good time to swim.

One time, we came from a doctor's  appointment  and went  straight  to the beach. The clouds were looking heavy and it looks  like it's gonna rain. Sasha and I  went to the playground with other  kids playing in the roundabout. I can see how much he loves seeing other  kids. I think he's  getting sick of always just being him and me all the time. When summer  comes I don't  know  how we can go out and play. And yeah, just before we decided  to go home, the heavy rain pour and almost flooding the  area. We heard  heavy drops hitting the glass part of the  car like  rocks being thrown at them. Then when we looked closely we found out it was hail  or ice cubes that's  pouring  in. It was fun. And the husband  always dream of dancing in the rain but of course Dubai isn't  the best place to do that. We went home to our chilly apartment and he cooked a really  hearty meal that made me feel guilty afterwards.

   The other  days we just  grab a bite and stayed a few minutes sitting  in the shore. It started to really  get hot. I will miss the blue sky and breeze once the Dubai oven turns  On again. And the AC will run again 24/7.

I hope  by that time, I have other places to go and other things to attend to. Fingers-crossed.

Cravings

Thoughts Running

Running. Running. Running.
I was grasping for air. I can't move. I can only hear voices screaming in my ears. But I can't stop them.

Then I felt somebody squeezing me.
I was dreaming. And I was awaken by my child clutching in my arms trying his best to get into my space. A cold night. He was trying to get into the blanket and smell me perhaps.

It's been a week now of almost having a panic -attack. Mid-sleep. Mid morning.
I worry too much. I think too much. I want too much. Of things almost within my reach yet so far like in a million light years ahead. Sometimes I feel all hope slipping right through my fingers.
Then I pray. I open His Word. And I felt strong again.

The echoes ringing in the walls when darkness creeps into the night.
He will only be home by morning. A lonesome sleep and waking up a few times by cries
asking for warmth, milk or my touch. My baby my love. Not easy but it makes my heart full.

I find serenity listening to 90s song. Hah.
Bringing back wonderful memories. Of growing up, with so much confusion, so much passion . Clouds of smoke passing by my horizon. Now they are gone . And I am a grown up.
But still inside, I feel always Seventeen. 

Getting There...

And so this happened...

We attended a friend's 4oth birthday last Thursday. And the boys were obliged to wear a mustache. Mine looks like this. Haha. It a 70s disco theme which I happened to miss wearing a costume. The night was so cold... I ended up sick the next day... 

Love love love

Sometimes I forget how difficult motherhood is whenever I see my liitle one giggling just seeing me. It's priceless and inexpensive pill when days aren't so bright. But there's also times when I go guilt tripping when I throw a big complain fiasco when he doesnt want to sleep and it's 130am.

It's no easy task being a full time mom, no matter how much I try to emphasize it I think nobody will really understand unless you're a SAHM yourself. 

It gets lonely in the house too when you miss going out with friends. 

I guess this is just My Season. 

By the way, Happy Valentines Day! 

We had plans actually, until Crew Control called and made us decide to move the celebration tomorrow. Oh well. 

I'm still thankful. And happy to be married to this guy. He really made an effort to make my heart swell. Thank you Lord. As long as I have my family, I have everything I need.

Motherhood Woes

   I feel really tired lately. Oh well losing the pooch really is a struggle. I returned to kickboxing since it's burning more fats and I really feel sore to the core afterwards. Surprisingly, I am not craving chocolates or sweets that much lately. Perhaps the intensity of my new workout makes me really get scared thinking how much work it will take to burn one chocolate bar. It's been a while that I've seen myself sweating this much and feeling really proud. Seriously, the abs is a piece of hard work in the making. I am dying inside whenever I see my reflection in the mirror telling my inner self to quit and crying because I can't. And I just got a cough. Oh man. It was a sorethroat gone wrong. Now I can't sleep at night without howling like a mad dog. I feel sorry for my baby because it wakes him up.


       I miss travelling. I. Really. Do.
       I need to find work soon. And I don't know where to start. And honestly, I don't want to settle. I am happy taking care of Sasha. My husband is a great provider. I can slack as much as I want. It's not more of going to work because I want money, it's more of, I want to be MORE. It's hard to really think it through that I am a stay at home mom. I need to do more, be more. I can't really say it exactly. But I have this hunger. And it needs to be fed. ASAP.

Red

Kitchen Love Affair

Marina Walk

  Oh well, Hello February!

   January took a quick turn and voila! Here we are. I have so much things in mind. So many errands to run. A truckload of personal projects to accomplish. Sometines I don't think 24 hours are just enough.

   The cool breeze hit us over the weekend, which is both beautiful and enchanting. It's like 'winter' just officially begun. I thought I need to bring out my sunday dresses but I was bewildered when we went to Marina last Friday. I was thinking to wear something that bares more skin and I was thankful that I changed to a reliable loose sweater.

     Hubby just came from a quick flight from Doha, and was kind enough to drop us to my cousin's. He had a minor back incident the day before when we came back to Creek. We realized how important it really is to take care of ourselves and just take a quick hard look on what really matters. Our health. Thank God that he is okay now and nothing serious occured. Regular exercise really a must now.

  The weather was beautiful. And to our surprise it was not so crowded in Jumeirah. It was really an enjoyable day out with the kids and the family.

Well, this little man just slept through... the entire stroll. Thank God for stroller. Otherwise I won't be able to carry him anymore and nobody would. Haha.