Lucky

I should better go now. It's late and my feet is cursing me when I dare to sweep the whole Raffles Place with my 3-inch heels. Damn! It's hot in here. Thank God I managed to put some light clothes with me otherwise my leather jacket is too off for this last minute getaway. My brother is living on the other side of the city. I can't believe my company is kind enough to put us here and not to some walking-distance to the airport hotels. But then this is Singapore and transportation is never a problem. Ah! I so missed this place! If only I have more than 24 hours to rediscover it.

Recipe for L-O-V-E

wanting...

a yellow winter coat ...

a bohemian summer look...

a mint -green coloured gown...

this casual look from Mango 

a strawberry cake in a bottle 

her "kicks" and her super-tonned abs and butt 

Her hair and her olive skin...

Her MK bag 

#allPhotosFromPinterest :-) 

#motivation

On hate

   I heard her came in the middle of the night as I almost jumped out of my bed. She carelessly banged the door and turn the AC on, now we're back in North Pole. With her strange English twang I started hating her gut and I can't stand near her. It feels like poison spreading in my body. The mere thought that she's just in the other room drives me mad. I feel like vomiting in blood.

   I once asked her how she was but she did not reply nor look at me. I just wasn't there." Who do you think you are" I wanted to scream at her but I was just engulfed with hate and anger as I control  myself that I might punch her face any moment. I don't know what her problem is. Only for sure she's just not fond of me. I want to talk to her but I just can't find the courage. I know it's not right to hate someone because in the first place it doesn't do me any good. I don't know what to do. If only she can just disappear into thin air.

   I tried to be nice until I got tired of trying. There's just some people you can't please. There's just people who will stab you in the back any moment. I just wish that I don't have to deal with her toxic energy every waking moment in this house. I wish I can wreck the AC control so I don't have to suffer from sleeping disorder because of the extreme temperature in my room. If only the AC is not centralized. If only she will find somewhere in the dark garden of her heart to be a little bit considerate. She once admit that she's a real Bi*$%@ before, well I guess she never changed.

   Eight months ago I met her in the kitchen as she was doing her dishes. She was still a little bit appropriate until I began to realize based on her stories about colleagues that she can't stand most of them. She once mentioned that she can't get along with this and that. In my mind I analyzed how much problem she's having with most of the people at work.

And now I guess, for whatever reason she started acting like a total B@#$ to me.

    I hope tomorrow I will find a pill that will change the way I feel about her. She's like a heavy dark shadow casting over my clear blue sky. And hopefully she will meet someone who can soften her cold cold heart.

   

I had no time to Hate by Emily Dickinson

I had no time to Hate --
Because
The Grave would hinder Me --
And Life was not so
Ample I
Could finish -- Enmity --

Nor had I time to Love --
But since
Some Industry must be --
The little Toil of Love --
I thought
Be large enough for Me --

How Do I Love Thee....( Happy Valentines Day! )

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways. I love thee to the depth and breadth and height My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight For the ends of Being and ideal Grace. I love thee to the level of everyday's Most quiet need, by sun and candle-light. I love thee freely, as men strive for Right; I love thee purely, as they turn from Praise. I love thee with a passion put to use In my old griefs, and with my childhood's faith. I love thee with a love I seemed to lose With my lost saints, --- I love thee with the breath, Smiles, tears, of all my life! --- and, if God choose, I shall but love thee better after death. - Elizabeth Browning

My Koreanovela trip

Over a truckload of kimchi and cute korean stufff...It's not so bad... going back to SEOUL after eight months...:-) freezing at this time of the year.....

Out and About #DubaiMall

Time

  It's my first time to just be living one day at a time quite literally. Since my reserved month started five days back I just have no choice but live in the moment and do my planning after six pm. It's both frustrating and exciting. I am no fan of big surprises and so most of the time I always end up praying to be notified first for whatever is going to happen. Oh well, for sure I will get to fly to some cities on the other side of the world only hoping that I won't have to suffer from  heavy snow because I am not carrying any fur coat whatsoever. Lazy month-- February, and looking forward to some exciting activities while waiting for Scheduling to notify me when somebody call in-sick and for me to takeover the missing Crew.

Today I am actually 19+ and one month old...you know. And for some strange reason I really do feel quite OLD. Not because of the numbers but just for the way I see life now as I reached this age. A lot of things have changed and my priorities too. Way back ten years ago I was just this girl who wants to make it BIG in her chosen field. My growing up years made up of school, extra curricular activities and auditions-- a lot of Searching for doors to open for me. I know what I want, I just want too many things and just don't know what to prioritize. Life is a race to the finish line ten years ago, now it's really about quality rather than quantity.

Time is the most precious thing you can give to your loved-ones. Hours spent you wished you can take back for more valuable moments is only now- a dream. I really miss just being a young woman who still lives with her parents. I never thought that I will feel this great hole inside my chest yearning to spend more time with my Mom and my Dad and my brothers in our house with our dogs. I miss being the one who waits in the gate 'til Mom and Dad gets home from work and prepare dinner. I miss hearing their stories and them reprimanding me about Boys. I miss school days and summer vacation. I miss being young and carefree. I had an amazing time discovering my path towards adult life. If I will  be given a chance to edit my life I guess I won't change a thing, only longer hours with my family.

I realized that as long as we live we have this great responsibility to keep planting seeds of love. It's not enough to just  say hello when it's Christmas. With the nature of my job, I am lucky enough to have this chance to meet lots and lots of people from different walks of life and from all corners of the world. I also realized that somehow I am making more friends quicker than ever before. And I am glad that I have the desire to get to know them really. Social media makes it easier for us to be connected wherever and whenever. I am thankful than in each area of my life I get to meet people who share the same passion with mine. I feel 10 times richer than my colleagues. I was a bit popular during High School and College days but the feeling that someone remembers me not because of my achievements but for my character is something else. I feel lighter. I feel more valuable as a human being.

Since my Mom passed away a year ago, I made sure to call my Dad every single day. He is my first love and my super hero before I get serious with boys and in falling-in love. It's hard for me seeing him alone in our house and even harder picturing him trying to look happy when he gets home finding no one . When I visited him a few weeks back I was a bit relieved to find out he's been going out a lot to spend more time in church with friends. He asked me not to call too much and assure me he is okay. Only just today I found out that he still waits for me to call him every single day and worries when I fail to do so. My heart just melted. It feels human to be needed. With my busy life most of the time I forget that somebody needs me not because it's my job but because they love me.

I only have 24 hours a day and flying makes my brain cells a bit cranky which makes me forget things. I am making a habit now to use post-it notes to remind me to when to call and whom to call.

When was the last time you speak with your best friend?
It's been years, maybe.
Life is short. Make the most of the chances available.

I love You February!!!

I should be sleeping by now and yet I just couldn't put away my thoughts. I know I just have to spare a few moments just to let it out.

Thank you God for everything. 

I couldn't put the best words to describe how I feel. The past few days had been challenging and fun at work.  I get the chance to fly with my favorite people on-board which made the excruciating hours more bearable, I managed to return back to Dubai on time whist the massive amount of delay. On top of that, there's always a moment that makes me reminded how much lucky I am to be showered with so much love.

I was a different person way back then. I guess God is always leading me to the right path where I would grow to become a better person. I could have turned out to be just another spoiled brat who would just settle for anything convenient  and who wouldn't  even bother striving for her dreams. I was right where I was and I guess there's a great reason why I am where I am now. Everything will work for the best.

I know there's no point in having regrets. But if I could ask for one magical wish to turn back time...I would ask for my Mom to be with us again...

I know in Heaven, she's proud of what I've become.